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Re: Arabeyes Gitex presentation

--- Mohammed Elzubeir <elzubeir at arabeyes dot org> wrote:
> Here is what I have of a draft for the presentation. Take a look and let
> me know your thoughts.
> I still didn't add the screenshots (and had some issues with adding
> images with openoffice).
> URL: http://www.arabeyes.org/~elzubeir/gitex-2003.sxi.bz2 [Oo file]
> URL: http://www.arabeyes.org/~elzubeir/gitex-2003.pdf.bz2 [PDF]

I looked at the PDF and here are my comments (listed by page number),

+ Most pages have too much whitespace - the line spacing seems to be
  too liberal for my taste and seem artificially to be spread-apart.
  You might be using 1.5 or 2.0 for spacing instead of the normal 1.0
+ 2nd bullet - s/the/virtually all applications'
+ Add new bullet at end - It's knowing you are secure without blind
+ Make 4th bullet be 3rd
+ s/House/Build
+ s/tap into/benefit from via a nurturing environment
+ s/propel/encourage
+ s/technical industry/bleeding-edge technology driven industry

+ s/focus/focus and resources
+ substitute "what is" with "what/who is"
+ replace 5th bullet with
  "Formed a focused plan/roadmap with means to attain and gauge its goals"

+ Put current 2nd bullet below the current 4th (which starts with bandwidth)
+ s/Feet/Desk
+ replace "(TM)" with true trade-mark symbol (correct size and upperscore)
+ sub "their time" with "their time/effort/resources"
+ Remove last bullet about meeting
+ Add,
  "Are looking into solidifying professional 5+ year commitment"

+ Add as a second bullet
  "Meetings are held online on IRC (Internet Relay Chat)"
+ s/meetings open/meetings are open/

+ first major bullet should be
  "Arabian Computer News (ACN - ITP.net)"
+ second major bullet should be
  "Middle East Networking (ITP.net)"
+ Include all the article names and dates below each major heading, those
  articles are noted in our about page.  So for ACN, you would have
  " - Jan 15, 2003: Lack of awareness holds back Linux"
  " - Jan 08, 2003: Linux Enterprise Ready"
  " - Jul 16, 2002: Pushing The Penguin"
+ Include a major bullet as "Television Media"
+ Under TV include,
  " - May 17, 2002: Abu Dhabi TV"
  " - May 11, 2002: Al-Jazeera Satellite TV"

+ Change title to "Arabeyes' Project Types"
+ Exchange location of Internal and external sub-bullets.  You will talk
  later about them in "external" then "internal" order, so have 'em be in
  that order here as well.
+ sub "Fonts project" with "Fonts/Art Projects"

+ Include all number of approx terms on each project - like Gnome/KDE as
  " GNOME, KDE    ( 13,000/41000 & 31,000/79,000)"
+ s/->/-to-
+ Last sub-bullet should be
  "World's first open source "Wordlist" (ver 0.5)   (86,000/129,000)
NOTE: make sure the parenthesis line-up so it looks nice.

+ s/Extend/Extend Arabic/
+ s/persual filter/pager/
+ s/crt/CRT/

+ s/application/applications/
+ move last bullet (number 5) to be before last (ie. make it be bullet #4)

+ s/A tool to allow for/Allows/
+ s/for initial installation/as initial installation medium/

+ title - s/Live CD/Live-CD/
+ s/Arabic Linux/World's first Arabic Linux/
+ last bullet should be,
  "Showcases many of Arabeyes' applications, documents and principles"
+ add
  "Intended to spark wider range of interest about Open Source and Arabeyes"
+ add
  "Intended to show and cement 'can be done' attitude"

+ add
  "Intended to provide a means to interpolate Arabic equations into graphs"

+ s/written in/written and prototyped in/

+ s/system./system/

+ s/Bidi/Bidirectionality (Bidi)
+ add
  "Includes various integrated tools - formating/printing/spell-checking/etc"

+ Make line starting with "Salvage" be a sub-bullet under the bullet which
  starts as "Create central"
+ On line with "Create central" s/open/open-sourced/
+ add another sub-bullet under "Create central"
  "Nurture required skill-set and establish know-how"

+ replace sub-bullet starting with "Distros support" with
  "Distribution support level (to influence RedHat/Mandrake/Debian/Suse, etc)

+ Before each sub-bullet add
  "Addressed to "

+ on 3rd sub-bullet (which starts with "impress upon") add at end
  " (presentations, seminars, courses, research projects, etc)"

+ This page needs to be as follows

  - Linux User Groups (LUG)
    = www.linux.org.sa
    = www.linux-egypt.org
    = Start one in your area !
  - www.linux4arab.org
  - www.arabiclinux.com
  - www.linux.org
  - www.linuxtoday.com
  - We want to hear from _YOU_ on www.arabeyes.org

Make sure to spell-check everything and make sure to upload the final
PDF and editable version to our webpages upon completion to be part of
our 'about' page.

Hope this helps; Salam.

 - Nadim

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